you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'
i am about to cut my stepbrother's hair into a mohawk with the same clippers i use to trim my pubes. god is so on my side today.
it was like that last scene in "It's A Wonderful Life" but with alcohol
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
Hey do u remember the time we used my mascara wand as a drink stirer?
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
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