I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
Answer the phone when I call you in a second. Just got pulled over for getting road head, going to secretly put you on speaker phone, this should be good
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
I'm babysitting my fucking roommate he took out the screen and is trying to throw dishware in our fucking pool after he repelled off our balcony
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
Tomorrow after you go to the library to look up gay porn, I'm going to come to your apartment to paint a nude portrait of you. Get pumped, plopernickle.
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
I told you I missed you and you said you missed me as much as you miss a urinary tract infection. I get it. You're still mad.
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
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