This is why you don't make out with cougars at a bar... I got a linkedin request from her, wtf?
I just threw up while getting a haircut. I'm never trying to accomplish stuff with a hangover again.
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
Dude, this chick, who is smokin by the way, has 4 false teeth on top from a softball accident that she can take out if she wants... Who's getting amazing head tonight? This guy!
I don't know whether to be creeped out by the fact this chick can do that, or jealous because you're getting toothless head.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
i'm sorry i gave your brother a handjob while you were on the blanket next to us, but to be fair your back was turned.
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
Just bought a breathalyzer and Sharpies, guess who thought of a new drinking game
You're like my zumba instructor for alcoholism right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
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