the ugly redhead just came into the bar, wearing a sombrero...by herself... who is going to tell her that its not cool to throw themed parties when you're the only guest?
This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
Its okay I walked into your house, searched for my wallet in your purse, and took a shot of Tequilia all without eye contact, right?
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
We're in an alley with a psychic wizard, shes reading our palms
Randomize
