You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
High as shit. I just described caramel syrup on crackers to my mom for 15 minutes...
The last thing I remember is singing hotel California with a hobo and asking every bald man I saw if I could touch his head.
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
I thought my neighbors locked me out of the building. Then I remembered I was drunk. PUSH AND TURN.
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
Tinder date just called. I was supposed to be there 30 minutes ago but I'm on a 27 game win streak in Park...?
Fuck that man! Tell her your dog died or something. Reschedule that shit, you can't stop 2K at a time like that. Ball is life bro... Priorities.
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
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