you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
a queef is a wish your heart makes.
Okay so if I'm going to keep referring to my hangover in the third person it needs a name.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found out that my father was a Human condom for halloween when I was 4. And to think I used to wonder where my sense of humor came from.
I'd like to say he was whispering sweet nothings into my ear all night but really he was just whispering "pussyyy"
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
Just talked a homeless guy out of suicide. Was rewarded with a garbage bag full of mountain dew bottles and zannies. Im such a good person
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
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