Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
I can't wait to see you & have espresso-fueled sex
Randomize
