I think my hot accountant is wearing banana republic. I miss the days when that ='ed gay. Signals are so confusing now.
better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
The 21 Worst Ways People Have Been Dumped
I'm glad the dog doesn't judge me for doing leftover lines and watching George of the Jungle at 10 am
My printer just jammed because one of the condom wrappers I threw when we had sex in my dorm
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
19 People Confess The Worst Things They Have Been Accused Of
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.