I found your undies. They were wrapped around my leg.
I've come to realize sober is a rare time of the day.
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
I told your dad we had a nice lunch and hung out for awhile. It seemed more appropriate than "I had a bite of his canned chili and then we ripped each others clothes off."
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
I was just lying down, dumping goldfish into my mouth and they like all came out I thought I was going to choke and die and people would be like damn that's so sad, she died laying in bed stuffing her face and reading kanye wests twitter, damn.
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
How drunk are you?
Completed.
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
Randomize
