We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
just hooked up with an air force officer in a hotel room paid for by the military. i feel like i should go around thanking taxpayers for the assist.
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
Did you fuck him in my garden last night?
That WOULD explain the dirt in my vagina
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
I feel sorry for the person who's phone number is 704-1776 cause from now on I'm giving that number to every guy I never wanna talk to again. Happy Independence Day
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
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