I love black thongs
you know you've been playing too much mario kart when you see a curve in the road ahead and see yourself drifting around it
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
My masturbation fantasy just had a wedding theme. I need new hobbies.
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
you told the police officer you wanted to be just like her one day but not a lesbian
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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