Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
I showered today. Officially upgrading myself to useless.
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
My makeup looks extraordinary for nine tequila shots, running four blocks, falling asleep with my face in the toilet, and doing the walk of shame across campus in the rain. And to think I'm single.
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The majority of the reason I want to get my pilot's license is so I can use the argument "FUCK YOU! I'M A PILOT!"
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
reason #1 why i should never live alone: i haven't put pants on since she left 26 hours ago. and ive made spaghetti 3 times.
In honor of the new administration, I'm going to make it my goal this weekend to get some lesbian action. Fuck Donald Trump and fuck Mike Pence. I'm going to be a spiteful gay.
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
Will you come get your son? He's using an old bike pump to help him fart the national anthem...
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