so i texed my mom when i was trashed last night and said "i know its 3 am, just go to bed and i'll be back by the time we leave for the airport"
i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
who do I fuck, the girl waiting for me upstairs or her roomate making me mac and cheese right now?? This is the single hardest decision I've always wanted to have to make
He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
Randomize
