I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
They don't even know who I am but they just woke me up with maracas and invited my boobs to a kegger
All he did was like my Instagram picture and I'm already planning how to turn down sex with him this weekend...
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
what better way to celebrate the birth of jesus christ than to get embarrassingly intoxicated and make poor decisions!?
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
Randomize
