Texts From Last Night

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  (702): View more from Nevada

  I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.

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  (702): I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal. http://tfl.nu/8mte
  Replies (3) Good night (863) Bad night (3641)
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  (718): View more from New York

  so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood

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  (718): so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood http://tfl.nu/a9i9
  Replies (11) Good night (745) Bad night (1679)
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  (240): View more from Maryland

  I just told her she was a heartbeat above a blowup doll.

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  (240): I just told her she was a heartbeat above a blowup doll. http://tfl.nu/r0xh
  Replies (18) Good night (1059) Bad night (3717)
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  (484): View more from Pennsylvania

  then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"

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  (484): then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon" http://tfl.nu/oypv
  Replies (7) Good night (4119) Bad night (651)
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  (304): View more from West Virginia

  He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.

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  (304): He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too. http://tfl.nu/2www
  Replies (42) Good night (1947) Bad night (14590)
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  (518): View more from New York

  Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.

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  (518): Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed. http://tfl.nu/gt11
  Replies (7) Good night (4495) Bad night (1151)
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  (731): View more from Tennessee

  who knew that if you vomit while skydiving the puke goes up towards the people that are behind you.

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  (731): who knew that if you vomit while skydiving the puke goes up towards the people that are behind you. http://tfl.nu/e0pj
  Replies (39) Good night (5366) Bad night (2431)
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  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes

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  (+44): what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes http://tfl.nu/x7um
  Replies (7) Good night (3420) Bad night (1306)
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  (484): View more from Pennsylvania

  hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home

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  (484): hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home http://tfl.nu/2xw9
  Replies (8) Good night (3937) Bad night (1218)
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  (702): View more from Nevada

  they just started filling water ballons with vodka.

  (1-702): View more from Nevada

  on my way.

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  (702): they just started filling water ballons with vodka. (1-702): on my way. http://tfl.nu/jo3z
  Replies (13) Good night (4126) Bad night (1067)
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  (304): View more from West Virginia

  I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry

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  (304): I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry http://tfl.nu/4kpv
  Replies (5) Good night (1500) Bad night (844)
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  (310): View more from California

  It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.

  (415): View more from California

  That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.

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  (310): It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter. (415): That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere. http://tfl.nu/8y5r
  Replies (11) Good night (2090) Bad night (679)
• Favorite

  (360): View more from Washington

  I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?

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  (360): I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years? http://tfl.nu/xhbr
  Replies (3) Good night (1428) Bad night (447)
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  (618): View more from Illinois

  I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job

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  (618): I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job http://tfl.nu/40h9
  Replies (6) Good night (440) Bad night (734)
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  (678): View more from Georgia

  Yeah bunch of crazy shit... Makes you wonder how anyone found someone before tinder

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  (678): Yeah bunch of crazy shit... Makes you wonder how anyone found someone before tinder http://tfl.nu/6csr
  Replies (3) Good night (449) Bad night (326)

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