For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
you will always have a special place in my vag
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
We just set the fire alarm off with a fog machine. What's my first instinct? Finish my drink. I think I handled that correctly.
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
Randomize
