I fell asleep on the toilet again last night...
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
We're gonna have the chick that teaches kindergarteners to fold origami roll the joints.
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
How naked do you want me to be?
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