I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
I worked so hard to shave everything last night. EVERYTHING. He WILL be answering my phone calls. Otherwise he's passing up awesome random birthday sex.
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
I started a USA chant at the bar last night for no reason, other than being plastered. Within 15 seconds, I was standing on a table and the whole bar was chanting but nobody knew why.
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
Randomize
