its been so long since i'vebeen laid i've forgotten what a penis looks like. When a guy makes me hot i picture him finishing the job by whipping a multi-setting showerhead out of his pants.
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
Princesses don't give blow jobs
ok, I understand that your bathroom door is broken, but at least close the blinds next time you take a shit. The entire parking garage just watched you.
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
Are you jealous of my sweatsuit? It's how I get men on Tinder.
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
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