Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
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Her tits were the only thing that upgraded her from "no way in fuck" to "drunken mistake"
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
I'm trying to convey to the smoking hot Spanish cleaning lady at work that I want to bone her but I think it's getting lost in translation. How do you say "blowjob" in Spanish?
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
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Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
He showed up at my apartment drunk with a telescope wanting me to look at the "blown up star" in -24 degree weather, claiming "it's in the name if science"
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
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