I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
I knew I shouldn't have slept with her...my dick looks like a stegosaurus tail
Even the bartender felt bad for me
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
I was relieved after I found the unopened condom in my pocket. Then I found the open one in the other pocket..
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
Wait. Did you let me snort wine last night cause I wanted to smell jesus's blood?
Yes. I have pictures. Your soul is mine.
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
Randomize