Seriously dude, you need to stop beating off to the ellen show, it's just weird.
I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
Lots of rum and cokes. Bartender wore my underwear on his head. Lost my keys. Accidentily started a fight. DC is going to kill me
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
Mom chose Thanksgiving to tell me the reason I am here is because she was too tired to give my dad a BJ and too drunk to make him pull out.
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
Of course he did! You’ve seen my tits, you know he didn’t stand a chance!
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