You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
Do you realize we just stole 12 dollars worth of quarters each from the office petty cash just to get manicures? New high or New Low?
its like my vagina has this homing beacon out to all the guys saying "come find me, i havent been shaved in weeks"
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
I just drank til 6am then boned a 32 yr old that looks exactly like ET. Oh god.
hotel security told us you walked into the hotel with blood all over your dress, weren't wearing any underwear and were escorted back by three men who were believed to be "homosexuals".
The ice cream man just told me to use protection.
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
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