I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
I've come to realize sober is a rare time of the day.
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
like, is this a date?? I'm sitting on his couch drinking a juice box while he makes taquitos in sweat pants
I was randomly pulled aside to have my bag checked. It had 50 condoms in it.
I enjoy the company of your penis
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize
