somebody snuck up and got me drunk
you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
I mixed the ketchup wit the mustard in one bottle to save time making hotdogs
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The problem is drunk me is completely unaware how poor I am
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
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