Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
Ha Ha the cop that just pulled me over would like me to tell you hi!
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
Yeah I tried to leave with 3 drinks and the bouncer wouldn't let me, I slammed all 3 right in front of him and football spiked them in the trash can
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
How drunk are u on a scale of one to couldn't get it up if u had a gun at ur head?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
Volunteering at a homeless shelter a bum asked if he could lick me cause I still reeked of whiskey. Being a bumsickle=epic hangover
Then a third Canadian I didn't know showed up to the hotel room at like 3am. I let him sleep in our bed because he had pizza.
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
I forgot wine drunk hurts
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