I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just took a shit in a BP station. It seemed appropriate since they are shtting in our ocean.
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
She just asked if I wanted to eat nachos off of her boobs... I'm going to marry this girl.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey, so I'm not coming into work til Friday. Some guy I've known for about 8 hours just offered me a free vacation to Maui and bought my plane ticket. He's Aussie so I'm 75% sure he won't murder me
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
Apparently I took a selfie with fried chicken at 2 am....I'm still trying to figure out where I got the chicken. I thought I was making mac & cheese.
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
I climbed on the arm of the futon, flapping my hand fan frantically and hissing imprecations at the smoke detector
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
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