I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
Yeah I had to push her down the hallway to the hotel room in a luggage carrier. The guy at the desk told me goodluck
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After he was done he gave me a case of landshark and tickets to tomorrows yankee game. This is the best nonrelationship ever
his phone is always ringing though. It makes me feel like I'm dating a doctor who's always on call.
yeah, dating a doctor sounds much better than fucking your drug dealer.
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
Why did my little sister call me from your phone this morning?
Things like this can't be explained over text man
Who am I sleeping next to in your bed? Where are you? Also when are you coming home... I need coffee.
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What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
I am literally drinking 7 day old water and looking for snacks in my room so I won't have to go in the hall and see roommate, because we accidentally banged last night. Please bring over some chicken and plan b.
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
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