he asked me to marry him on one of those scrolling message belt buckels.... what now?
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
there is way too much butter on my body for this to be okay
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
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Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
Everyone here knows me as 'that chick who will most likely steal your girlfriend'. My 99% success rate tells me this name is acceptable.
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Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
We'll get you some ice cream, but no sprinkles. Sprinkles are for winners.
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
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