I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
So he just rolled over in his sleep and said "that's a punctuation mark..."
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
oh dont worry, my liver will give out way before i get skin cancer
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
You're like my little fucked up version of the groundhog seeing its shadow, only it's boobs and warm weather.
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
Wake up. Smoke. Masturbate while eggos cook. Go back to bed. Smoke. Body spray shower. Beer with breakfast. Class. Morning of a champion.
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
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