there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
Omg just woke up. 6am. random apartment. broad daylight. bunch of ppl doin coke around me. Theres a bridge nearby. I think my dentist is down the block. Oof.
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
I just got turned down by a drunk fat chick. At my own birthday party. God hates me.
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Two options. One, you listen while I freak out. Two, we have mediocre to awesome car sex and don't talk. Either way, I'll be there by 7
I need to be drunk within 15 minutes of getting home tonight.
I'm drinking vodka. Get ready for my famous "come over" mass snapchats
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
I was looking for a pen and I stumbled upon my mom's vibrator. On a related note, yes I will be going out tonight.
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
Randomize