I tried to use my car keys to open my door
I just started a sentence with yellow.
You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
I just imagined your drunkass eating Taco Bell in my living room. This is the Godmother of my potential child.
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
Please tell me why I’m standing naked in the kitchen drinking pickle juice out of the jar & there is a container of potatoe salad with no lid & a spoon in it on the floor 🤦♀️
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