Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
i just ate two sandwiches and am debating booty calling my landlord
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
Randomize
