Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
I taped Calvin and Kyles heads together face to face while they were passed out. You should have seen them stumbling around using hungover teamwork trying to find scissors.
Got free coffee because I told the guy at starbucks the pleats in his khaki pants made his cock look big.
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
At least you got a round of applause for dancing like vanilla ice across the street and into the bar. Even as you were getting carded
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
You are not allowed to sing ever again, my ears are still ringing.
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
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