Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
God I need to stop before there's a picture of my dick on my mom's phone.
Looks like I accidentally stole two of your beers and left my pants at your place.
How did you leave without pants?
You know my vagina and my heart have a mind of their own even when it’s pouring snow.
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
Plus he probably didn't want to be at home, alone... Jacking off on the big screen without you there to lend a helping hand. I mean, let's be honest. It's not fun if it's not a little weird.
Randomize
