watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
What can I say, your life is charmed. I'm on the couch trying to decide whether or not to puke again.
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
I just realized my life is a timeline of drunken injuries.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
I feel like I'm a car that keeps getting Bacardi 151 instead of fuel
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