when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
I apparently took a 45 minute shower, and became best friends with his mom.
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
It was like watching Stephen Hawking try to swim.
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
FUCK YOU VODKA I'M TRYING TO ADULT RIGHT NOW
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
I should buy myself lingerie for Valentine’s Day instead of a present for you because I am the present
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize
