Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
I felt like a fire hydrant the vomit just kept coming out
I'm not proud of how I threatened that 8 year old during drunken laser tag
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
he just fucked me for my cheese..
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
He wouldn’t know a good thing if it bit him on the ass. Which, btw, I did.
He’s basically a sexual superhero. A mild mannered marketing intern by day, but a very horny 22 year old with pornstar stamina at nights!
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