You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
it's not cheating when I paid for it
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
We can't go back there. Ever. No context required, just know it's true.
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
I'm pretty sure I just won at life. I touched the bushy tail of a squirrel while he had his mouth full and was digging in a plant on campus. That is all.
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
Randomize
