call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
There is a homeless man handing out free beer on the city bus. He has a cooler and everything. I love this trashy yet generous city.
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
Just sharpening my eyeliner with a butterfly knife. You know. Typical weekday morning.
There is a 97.5% chance that my sketchy roommate is also a hooker.
So when can I meet her?
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
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