My cousins just decided to make a catapult to spread my Grandpa's cremated remains. I love my family.
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
I need a new best friend. Someone who drinks like a fish, hooks up enough to raise eyebrows, and isn't afraid to admit that masturbation is the second best way to spend time. Someone like me! Help me put up posters.
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
How are you feeling today?
Like Satan handed me a grenade and ass sandwich.
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
Randomize
