thus making me awesome and them whores
Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
I put my bosses number in my phone as "Do not call," I shouldve known my drunk curiosity would overcome any desire I had to keep my job.
again?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he left me a 6 minute video of him peeling a clementine listening to justin bieber
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
apparently the last bar didn't like my halloween costume with syringes filled with whiskey
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
I hit a child with a fudge sickle from a moving vehicle after he flipped me off, I feel like a God. Tell no one. My partner didn't see it.
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
one of my coworkers asked me if I was PMSing today...... excuse me sir, but it is none of your business as to what my uterus is or is not doing right now. fucker.
and yea, I'm PMSing.
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