I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
Ordered weed last night from the delivery service, and who showed up...my old real estate broker. He said, "this is less stressful." Duh.
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
I have got to stop assigning last names to girls I get numbers from based on what I think will remind me of them... Sarah Petrydish is not an acceptable memory trigger
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
I told him to pick up the beer can he threw in front of the police station. So he gets out chugs whatever's left and throws it back and says ok let's go.
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
There is a drunken, assless white chick here at this bar wearing a shirt that says "REAL WOMEN TWERK FOR JESUS". I have officially had it with our generation.
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
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