just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
You refused to get in the cab so we rock paper scissored to decide who walked you home and the fat guy was it. So don't blame your poor hook-up choice on me; it was all you.
Fun fact of the day: Our cat does not like rum.
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
you put your dick on my shoulder this morning like it was a fucking parrot
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
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