Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
you know your drunk when 7 soccer players cant catch up to a tranny in high heels who just stole your wallet
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
Just had a horrible realization. I've fucked a guy with a webbed foot AND a guy with a third nipple.
And then you told me I had large hands and looked like a girl who would have an illegitimate child that I never talked about
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
Like I'm literally drinking whiskey and making a stocking for my cat right now. What. Goes. On.
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
My mom just came upstairs handed me an Adderall and asked if I could help her wash the ceilings
you were walking down the sidewalk and just puked. didnt even stop or slow down and just kept going. i was so impressed i didnt even tell anyone you threw up on passing peoples shoes.
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
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