i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
She calls me Shortcake and bites my ear. Trust me, I'm FINE with bein the secret lesbian lover.
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
I gave the naked guy in the hotel a pop tart. He stopped crying.
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.