just ate pastrami before passing out in my hotel room. My room smells like a petting zoo
i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
I found her in the bathroom licking her screwdriver off the floor. she said there was no way she was wasting a $6 drink.
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
remember when I told you about my grandma asking me about my sex scars? Less comfortable than that
The things happening in my intestines right now should only ever happen at truck stops and frat houses.
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
I didn't even know we were hiding from the cops, I was just playing with the cats. People kept telling me to be quiet the cops are here and I was like DID YOU SEE THIS CAT!?
Randomize
