How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
I made her a sippy cup with eggnog and whiskey. My meditation app told me to go the extra mile for someone today, so I did.
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
IM ON THE WEIRD DRUGS AND I JUST SAW THAT TOM HARDY THING NOW I WANT TO HUMP
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
Randomize
