actually, I'm a sock model
I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
Just woke up and my doorbell is on my nightstand... the fuck?
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
Nothing shouts "I'm single" like a thousand needlepoint pillows.
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
Randomize
