escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
I wasn't interested in him...but then he played The Office theme song on acoustic guitar. I'm sorry.
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
its preseason football. its like non alcoholic beer. who gives a fuck
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
It's such a good feeling to send those "I'm not in jail" texts on Sunday morning
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
how I know last night was a good night: this morning I found a bottle of tapatio, a bag of chicken and a bag of popcorn in my purse.
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
Someone just needs to roll me into a blanket burrito and feed me drugs
I shit myself and fell down the stairs and I’m still finding shit In those pants.
Randomize
