Your tits are I can't wait for
I just found out the FDA voted to ban Vicodin, my last connection to this world has been destroyed
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
Ok now I cleared out half the bar and Em and I have 5 Jameson shots lined up for you. You have 15 min.
And you will no longer be getting a thank you note from my vagina
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
Hi I am too sober and out of rum. Translation: I owe you some beer. Also, get better taste in beer.
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
I'm putting his belongings the garage sale so he can buy his own stuff back. # divorced life. Thanks for cheating on me you tone deaf dick biscuit that'll be $20. Haha.
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
Bear grylls would be proud of my improvisation. Just used her vibrator to massage my back after hurting it at work.
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